Nandi Madida on being intentional as a mother and as an artist
Nandi Madida has been blessed with a fulfilling career and two beautiful children and by no means does she take any of it for granted.
She is married to Grammy Award-winning producer Zakes Bantwini and together, the couple have a seven-year-old son, Shaka and a five-year-old daughter, Nefertiti.
The musician and Apple Music's “Africa Now” Radio host recently chatted to Independent Media Lifestyle about how she manages her entertainment industry career and still makes sure she is fully present for her kids.
“I have been blessed with an incredible career, but I think the concept of juggling or being able to balance work and motherhood is really and truly a fallacy.
“You take each day as it comes and that’s with anyone, whether you are a mother or not, you just do the best you can do,” she explained.
Madida added that it is important to prepare and be intentional with everything you do.
“You can’t predict life, life happens and you deal with it the best way you can, so ensure that you are emotionally regulated as a parent and a human being.
“Be intentional about your planning and ensure that you reach your full potential or at least do your best, especially as a mother and a career woman, and generally and genuinely the outcomes are to your favour, but again, life is always unpredictable.
“What’s more important is that mothers also be kind to themselves because not every day is going to be well-balanced.”
Madida, who works from home most days, is able to do much of her motherly duties despite having a great team behind her.
“My work hours are very flexible and I don’t take that for granted. I am very involved in the drop-offs, pick-ups, extramurals or whatever my kids need... I am also lucky that I have a great team of people who help me and they are incredibly kind to my kids as well.
“But as much as you may have a team, kids always want their parents around and visible, so that’s important to me. Being around allows me to understand my kids and their needs as well.”
The “Organic” hitmaker said while she values the time she spends with her children, she understands that time away from them is essential and usually finds time during her work trips to squeeze in a shopping spree or go to the spa.
“I think it is important to give yourself ‘me’ time, but my kids are growing so quickly so I try to be there as much as I can.
“I usually find my travels, which are usually for work, a moment to take a break. So I unintentionally take a break away from my kids and maybe I’ll squeeze in shopping time or go to the spa.
“I always say in the next 10 to 12 years they will be adults and that will be it, so I don’t want to miss out on any moments, but the balance is imperative.”
During her years of being a mother, Madida has picked up a trick of two, and one of them is to always keep your emotions regulated.
“Personally, I feel what’s really beneficial to help kids’ lives become less stressful is for you to be less stressed.
“Kids pick up on emotions, they are very intuitive, so if you’re regulated and work on yourself, you ensure your kids feed off that energy.
“It’s all internal. Your kids see how you react in certain situations and that’s how they become.”
She added that it’s important for parents to provide a peaceful, healthy, happy and realistic home.
“If you do lose yourself for whatever reason along the way, make sure you account for that so they (kids) understand that you’re human.”
Her advice for new or struggling moms is to do what’s best for themselves, to always check in to make sure that everything is okay and seek help if they need it.
“My advice for our beautiful new mothers and struggling mothers as well is that one has to be kind to oneself.
“Working on your autonomy is the most important thing; understand what works for you. You might get a lot of advice, but you’re going to navigate yourself in a way that feels comfortable for you, and a lot of the time you may feel pressured to do otherwise, you are a human.
“From a mental health perspective, ensure that you just check in. Sometimes it’s postpartum, sometimes it’s just being overwhelmed and that’s okay. So see what helps you, whether it’s a professional or otherwise. Your feelings are always valid.”
She added that we only get one shot at parenting, so it is important to ensure we raise “well-balanced, happy, peaceful, content and loving children”.